08.30.08
Best Songs about Family Law / the Law
1. Tainted Love/Where Did Our Love Go by Soft Cell
Usually talks about the first time someone wants to leave a relationship. “I want to get away, I want to runaway.”
2. Should I Stay or Should I Go by The Clash
Cool song by a cool band. Asks the obvious question.
3. Lawyers, Guns, and Money by Warren Zevon
How should we settle disputes? I submit the law allows for the peaceful settlement of disputes. Contact one of the lawyers at Galvin, Dominguez, Hindera, & Schwab LLP and schedule an appointment to see if we can help with your dispute.
4. Know Your Rights by The Clash
Again, this is so important if you are served with any type of lawsuit. Contact your lawyer.
5. What’s Love Got to do With It by Tina Turner
Supposedly a song about her relationship with the late Ike Turner reportedly involving domestic violence, abuse, infidelity, and cruelty. The important thing to take from this is that love has nothing to do with a family law case. It’s about division of assets and/or how to care for the children.
6. No Surrender by Bruce Springsteen
From the time the case begins to the end just remember this line “no retreat, no surrender.”
7. We Can Work it Out by The Beatles
The ultimate mediation song.
8. Burning Down the House by the Talking Heads
How most people feel after a property settlement.
9. Sweet Child of Mine by Sheryl Crow and Guns n Roses
Remember to never get the children in the middle. They are our sweet children. Our beautiful boys and our beautiful girls. Sheryl talks about a boy and G n R about a girl.
10. I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor
Disco era song that has become the anthem persons involved in failed relationships everywhere. The neat thing is most people do survive.
Other Good Songs About the Law
1. Breaking the Law by Judas Priest
For criminal law. Another cool band. Saw them way back when at the Sam Houston Colisseum in Houston.
2. America by Neil Diamond
The best song for immigration law…except for maybe The Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin. Never been a huge Neil fan but you got to admit, he is the leader of planet chest hair.
3. Mack the Knife by various artists including Louis Armstrong, Bobby Darin, and Frank Sinatra
Again, criminal law. Talks about the knifing portrayed in the Three Penny Opera.
4. Our Lawyer had Us Change the Name of This Song so We Wouldn’t Get Sued by The Fallout Boys
A song involving music copyright. Not that it actually does, but you got to admit, it’s a cool title.
5. I Fought the Law by The Clash
Yes, another song by The Clash. I’m trying not to be biased even though I wore out the grooves to London Calling and Combat Rock. Later, I played the cassettes so much the tape was paper thin where every third word was missing. Lost the CDs in a divorce. Now I have the songs from ITunes. Seems I was destined to be a lawyer…and sample all music technology.
06.29.08
Worst Legal Movies-Awful, Awful, Awful
I accumulated this list by punishing my senses to suffer so those who are warned can spared and keep their brain cells intact. Though there may be worse movies, the movies on this list are those produced so that there would some seriousness taken in their making. Regardless of budget, star power, director, or script these are the truly horrendous legal movies I’ve seen so you don’t have to.
5. Soul Man
Saw this movie back in the 80’s and even before the marriage leading to the divorce leading to the degree leading to the law degree leading to the bar exam leading to the formation of GDH&S had yet to occur, I knew then this is one god awful movie. Ayre Gross is a funny guy and I liked C. Thomas Howell in Gettysburg and I’m sure Rae Dong Chong has a good movie somewhere but everyone sucked in this. Mark Watson is cut off by his father and can’t get a loan to go to Harvard Law School so he overdoses on tanning pills and gets a perm. Stupid look and nobody figures out he’s white? Offensive but “redeeming” because he learns about prejudice…not. James Earl Jones must have needed rent money.
4. Jury Duty
Pauly Shore stars. I can halfway stand him as Johnny Drama’s antagonist on “Entourage.” But this is just one awful movie. If you feel the need to watch…don’t spend money on it and remember, you’ll never get the time back. He wants to get on a jury so he can get money for a place to live? I could just review the movie but I hate being so negative. If you want to watch a good Pauly Shore movie…you will just have to wait for it to be made.
3. The Pelican Brief
This Grisham work wins (loses) over the Runaway Jury because it stars two Oscar Winners, Denzel Washington and the overrated Julia Roberts. Someone is murdering U.S. Supreme Court justices and Julia Roberts writes a brief detailing who she thinks is behind the killings. Yes, a law student out-thought everyone investigating the case. Then everyone who reads this brief dies. Must have been one crappy brief. She and Denzel, a reporter, go on the run, hiding and evading their pursuers who are after them for this brief. My question is: Why not just fax it to every law enforcement agency and newspaper in the country, state, county…moral is, there are no stupid briefs, just stupid people who write briefs.
2. Seems Like Old Times
Goldie Hawn and Chevy Chase. A bunch of dogs (Not including Chevy Chase). Charles Grodin. Dumb script. Goldie is defense attorney married to DA Grodin. Chase is Goldie’s ex husband who’s a fugitive. This is the best that it gets. I believe its rated PG so you can make your children watch it if they don’t want to do their homework. They’ll be National Merit Scholars and you’ll be on trial for child abuse.
1. TIE Body of Evidence
This is one awful movie made at the time Madonna was “shocking” everyone with her book SEX. If you didn’t see the nude photos, you’ll get your fill here. Joe Montegna and Willem Dafoe also star in this moronic plot where Madonna is accused of murder for killing her septuagenarian millionaire lover by…get this…screwing him to death. Willem Dafoe defends and believes in her until he falls into her games of hot candle wax, handcuffs, and having sex with someone a thousand others have passed. Don’t bother.
1. TIE Suspect
Another awful movie starring an actress who doesn’t have a last name…Cher. Joe Montegna is in this movie too. So is Dennis Quaid and Liam Neeson. But it’s horrendous. A juror (Quaid)helping a public defender (Cher) solve the crime during a jury trial. Yes, during a jury trial. This plotline alone makes this waste of time tied for the worst legal movie ever.
06.15.08
Best Father’s Day Movies
5. Hook
Not the best movie, but a great Father’s Day movie. I saw this movie with my children years ago when they were young and I was just younger. There’s a scene in the middle of the movie that all fathers should watch. Peter Banning (Robin Williams), nee Peter Pan (Robin Williams, later in a Peter Pan outfit complete with green tights), is now a corporate lawyer neglecting his children and taking calls on one of the largest cell phones ever made. His wife throws the phone out the window. Moira Banning, played by Caroline Goodall, tells/yells to him that he only gets a few years and he’s missing them. That one day, his children won’t want him around, won’t want to talk to him and will be going their own way. She’s right. They are great years. Nothing is worth missing them. I remember watching my sons play lacrosse and soccer. Those were the greatest moments of my life. Now, 17 and 18, those times will never come again. New experiences yes…but not those. Don’t miss yours.
4. In the Name of the Father
This is salute to my law partner and dear friend Rob Galvin. He’s repeatedly mentioned this movie as one of his favorites and this is truly one great movie and one great Father’s Day movie. The movie stars Pete Postlewait (Oscar nominated for this role) and Daniel Day Lewis (Oscar nominated for this role and many others, the Meryl Streep of male actors) in this adaptation of a true story of the Guilford Four who were accused of being IRA terrorists in the bombing of a London pub. Gerry Conlin’s (Lewis) father, Guisseppe (Postlewait), is also accused due to draconian terrorist laws suspending civil liberties (sound familiar?) and both are imprisoned together. Being imprisoned together changes Gerry’s impression of his father and Guisseppe eventually secures Gerry’s release even though he himself dies in prison.
3. Liar, Liar
Jim Carrey star as Fletcher Reed, a lawyer who, because of the birthday wish of his neglected son, Max, cannot tell a lie for 24 hours. There are two thoughts I have to this movie. First, nothing is more important in our lives than our children. Not work, not being upset at the other parent, not friends, nothing is worth missing out on the few precious years a parent has with their children.
2. Field of Dreams
One of my favorite movies. I actually saw this movie at a theater with my Father in Baltimore, Md. Though the focus is baseball, it is actually one of the best father-son movies ever made. Ray Kinsella (Kevin Costner back when he did good movies) makes amends for saying things he regrets to his father John Kinsella (Dwier Brown). Sure he has to build a baseball field in his cornfield, travel to Boston and kidnap a reclusive novelist, and travel to Minnesota to find a long-dead doctor. All of this culminates in a great ending and every son’s endeavor; playing a game of catch with his father. Nothing legal here but a kidnapping and a possible foreclosure.
1. Return of the Jedi
Not a legal movie unless you count Luke’s appearance before the emperor and Darth Vader as a trial of sorts. But Darth Vader, having revealed himself to be Luke’s father in Empire Strikes Back wants to establish a father-son bond by having Luke join him by going to the Dark Side. Luke doesn’t want to enter the family business of reigning over the galaxy and they attempt to resolve their differences of opinion in Luke’s career choice by having a duel to the death. Father and son in the course of their family infighting manage to chop each other’s hand off (Luke’s was chopped off in Empire). If only Darth had realized the truth about children. You can’t turn them to the Dark Side. They won’t listen to you.
HONORABLE MENTION
The Sopranos
Tony, Tony, Tony. I watch him and I don’t feel so bad about my failures as a husband and a father. I also understand the anxiety of balancing work and family.
The Godfather
My father bought me a gun when I was 12 and told me not to shoot anyone. (interestingly enough, he never said anything about me shooting myself) Vito Corleone bought his children guns and told them to shoot everybody. Fredo notwithstanding, Sonny and Michael took the fatherly advice to heart.
Big Fish
Great movie. Not sure why it’s not on the list other than no lawyer or legal hook to it. Watch it. Saw it with my father a couple of years ago. I got the feeling he was remembering his father while I applied the movie to him.
Big Daddy
Yes, it stars Adam Sandler. It also has a ridiculous courtroom scene but it does show that being present at the moment of conception does not make a father. It’s what a man does every year, every month, every week, and every day afterwards that truly makes a man a father.
A Time to Kill
Father kills the men accused of raping his daughter. Reminds me of an argument a lawyer made in Court about a father being protective. Also has a stupid scene with Sandra Bollock in a mini skirt sneaking into a doctor’s office to steal records. Why didn’t they just ask for discovery?
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
I really related to this movie. No matter what you accomplish, no matter how many children you raise, no matter what businesses you build, no matter how many degrees you earn…your father will continue to criticize you.
05.19.08
The Ten Greatest Movie Clients of All Time
10. William Gambini played by Ralph Machio in My Cousin Vinny. Ok…not the greatest actor, but the Karate Kid is accused of murder. He is great because he knows who to call to represent him, “MY COUSIN VINNY!” And Vinny brings Mona Lisa Vito, the best legal assistant in world other than Carol Price (my real world assistant.) But even Carol cannot make me forget Marissa Tomei.
9. Marylin played by Catherine Zeta Jones. In “Intolerable Cruelty”, she’s the antagonist to family law attorney Miles (George Clooney.) To quote Miles, “You facsinate me.” One of the few movies about family law.
8. Tom Robinson from “To Kill a Mockingbird.” Played by the great Brock Peters, he’s the man who taught everyone never to go chop chiferots because it’s going to get you into trouble for raping a white woman. To this day, I’d like to know what the hell is a chiferot and why it needs to be chopped.
7. Anyone defended by Perry Mason. Because they are always “not guilty.”
6. Captain Queeg from Herman Wouk’s “The Caine Mutiny.” He’s played by Humphrey Bogart, the original badass. You have to be a badass when your name is Humphrey. And still…Captain Queeg is not the craziest person I’ve ever had for a client.
5. Tie: Velma Kelly and Roxie Hart; Chicago. Played by Catherine Zeta Jones and Renee Zellweger. Enough said.
4 Chef from South Park. If Chewbacca lives with the Ewoks; you must acquit.
3. Vinnie Chase from “Entourage.” Cause you get to be Ari Gold. You get to go to Vegas for free. You meet starlets. Technically Ari is an agent, but he did graduate from law school.
2. Larry Flynt played by Woody Harrelson. The real life client in the biopic, “The People vs. Larry Flynt.” Always in trouble. Always goes to trial. Always uses the same lawyer (Alan Isaacman played by Edward Norton). Always pays his retainer.
1. Vito Corleone from the “Godfather.” Because it would just be so cool to be his lawyer, unless of course, you like horses. And you get to be called “consiglieri.”
